Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Emotional basket case

Pretty sure being an emotional basket case is not a good thing for raising a 10 year old and a 17 year old.  Of course they both definitely need to learn to allow their emotions to show and not be afraid of them, but mine are ridiculous.  I blame my grandmother...and believe it or not, I am actually one of the least emotional of all my family.  Scary thought!  Oh well, they will get over it...they have no choice, they are stuck with me.

In being an emotional basket case, i am really struggling with being angry at someone who has put me and caused me to put others in a very awkward position.  I am also angry with myself for being stupid enough to fall into the situation myself.  It irritates me to no end that because of circumstances, I can not just be myself b/c if I am completly honest and opened it will cause discomfort for others around.  Yeah, yeah I know, life is never fair...just deal with it.  Okay...dealing (sort of)

As my emotions and thought churn and battle inside I am surrounded by some of the most amazing friends anyone could have.  Of course that just increases the torrential downpour of tears.  I am more grateful than can be imagined that God has blessed me with such an amazing support group, but being an independent person who needs to prove she can make it as a single mother, single woman, female in a world where males are preferred and dominate and women are stupid emotional beings, it is very diffcult for me to accept that love and support.  Thankfully my friends don't take no for an answer

1 comment:

  1. Since I don't know any back story, I am afraid I am not much help, but I can't help but laugh. You have never been afraid of emotions, at least not in the years I have known you. Please, don't think you should start trying now! You are an independent woman. End of story. Emotions are allowed, and should never be looked down on - especially from a strong, independent woman. Don't let anyone tell you different, or make you feel you are weak or stupid because of "emotions". They make us stronger - women are stronger because we let our emotions out rather then burying them!
    Emotions include both tears and laughter, anger and fear. We all feel many every day. Those who accept and deal with them are the healthy ones.
    Love you!

    ReplyDelete